Part 2 of My life & The Bookstore

Our mall has pretty high rent agreements.  No surprise that stores started to just shut down leaving one end pretty empty.  Then the local Walmart decided to become Super Walmart  and bought the majority of space making the remaining stores move.  Yep we were set to move.

For one week, I still worked but not with the public.  We were moving the store cartload of books at a time.  Also cleaning and assembling the new store.  Lots of work but very enjoyable.  Now at the same time my mother and I were moving about 30 minutes from where we were.  So there was a lot of moving going on for me at this time.

I had been in a relationship that wasn't too healthy.  I couldn't really see it at the time though. We had moved in together by accident.  My mother had been drinking, which she hadn't done when I was growing up, but it was excessive.  She hadn't liked my new boyfriend because even though the previous one had been abusive she wanted him to be around.  One night out of no where while Gordon (the new one) was there she just came in my room and said nothing, just glared.  It was a hard time and he told me to stay with him.  That I didn't deserve this. (There had been other times and things said).  So I left and stayed with him, fully planning on moving out of his place and in with a friend.  Well she had one reason after another as to why the apartment we were going to rent wasn't ready.  He and I just sort of stayed together, we wanted to be together.  Somewhere after 2 years he changed.  He changed and blamed me.  There were lots of tears and hurt.  One night I couldn't take the hurt and wanted to die.  I had the knife but looking at my dogs watching me I couldn't.  That was the night the cutting started though.  A few months later after daily therapy I moved into my cousins house.  We no longer lived together but we were together.

Eventually it seemed like he cared.  I would stay with him some nights at our old place.  After a while I moved back.  Without a word, he stopped coming home. He also had moved out.  So I couldn't afford the place myself and moved back in with my mother.  Which is why I was now with her in her move.  Thing is we were moving to a place that was near where Gordon lived but I, his still girlfriend, didn't know where that was.  Even after we moved it took weeks before he told me that we actually were at the bottom of the hill he lived on. 

Once the story opened again I was made the new key holder.  I could open and close the store and I guess it's like a shift manager.  With that came a slight raise so I could start paying off all the bills that were left in my name from living with Gordon and also from the months of not being able to work. 

The store had already become like home to me.  The manager and assistant manager were fun and caring.  They understood me and my hurt.  I became more and more a bookseller.  The great thing was reading so many books not just the ARCs but also being able to sign out books.  Yep, when you work for Borders you can sign out books, read them, and if you keep them in resell able condition bring them back.  So you may have bought a book that I read.  : )

Now the people knew about Gordon and I.  They heard the phone conversations while on my breaks, saw him when he'd pick me up or drop me off,  heard the stories.  If they had seen the unhealthiness of us they never said it. Would I have even listened? 

In June of 2004 I found out Gordon had cheated on me.  I called before work and he didn't want to talk about it.  I have a great sense about this stuff and made him tell me.  He said he had met someone over the weekend.  Now, in his story we were not a couple but everyone who knew me knows the truth.  He called, we'd still see each other all the time, he even had started talking about us moving back in together.  Then this. 

I feel apart.  I called and told them I was sorry and couldn't work.  I told them what happened.  Instead of chastising or giving me a hard time in any way they said not to worry and asked about how much time I might need off.  They then called back a few minutes later.  Not for anything work related but to see about coming to get me and working out that I would stay with the assistant manager, Sandie.  They knew things were rough between my mother and I and also about the cutting.  These people were not just co workers, they cared and had discussed how to keep me safe.  

A Blog That I Haven't Wanted To Write- Pt. 1

Last week it was announced that Borders Group Inc was folding.  Many people did not realize but Waldenbooks was owned by them.  With the end of a business all stores must close, and that is where it gets hard.

I worked for our local Waldenbooks (store #1055) for several years.  Years in which so much took place.  The closing has been hard for me -  yes, I have cried about it, in fact I choke up now.  Maybe it seems odd or over dramatic but I really am feeling a loss.

To start, I had agoraphobia that started with my panic disorder in late 2001.  As you may have guessed, with that comes great bills but since I could not work, I had no money.  So finally after enough meds built up in my system I started to work at a store in the mall.  I ended up working so little hours there that I made maybe $75 in two weeks.  So I took another job for the holidays working at Waldenbooks which was right next to the store I already was working in.  I generally worked out in the Kiosk during this time for them selling for Day by Day Calendars (yep another one I bet you didn't know Border's had).  By the beginning of January my time was up and I was let go.  Turns out the store I was working in was closing and would be out by the end of January.

I was lucky that one of the regular employees was leaving to fight the war on terrorism and they needed a new person to take his place.  So two weeks after I was let go, I was rehired.

I was still part time but made in one week what I was getting in two at the previous store.  Plus, I got a discount on books!  Great for a nerdy girl like me. 

I'm pretty sure at first my new job was at risk.  I was very shy and hated approaching customers because I didn't really know many of the authors they were looking for.  One man asked where John Sanford was and I must have had a deer in headlights look because the Assistant Manger, Sandi, told me Mystery.  So I took the gentleman over to the mystery section.  Honestly, when i had to ask what I could help people find, in my head I would be wishing them to say nothing, they didn't need help, they knew where it was, etc. 

There were monthly reviews when I started and it was one of my areas to improve upon.  I must have started to hold in that fear because I remember while shelving books the Manager, Annette came out and said since I had been trying harder that I could have the copy of an advanced reader that came in.  I can not remember exactly which book it was but it was from The Anita Blake series by Laurell K Hamilton.  (A Vampire Book from before Twilight made them sparkle). 

Eventually I got more comfortable, read the magazine the came in telling of authors and up coming releases, hours of looking up and shelving books, etc  that I felt confidant  that I knew the who, what, when, and where of books and authors.  My next hurtle was the Preferred Reader card. 


Remember those?  $10.00 a year saved you 10% each time and helped you accrue points that would then turn into $5.00 coupons.  They really did pay for themselves if you were an avid reader / customer.  I would get about 3 of those coupons a year and I could not use the card and my employee discount.  Well for some reason I could not get people to buy them.  I wasn't confident in the sales pitch and would often OVERsell it until it didn't get sold.  It also took a while before I got the hang of up selling (adding that 1 more item). 

I am very lucky that I got the hang of it and that I had bosses that were there to help and teach me.

Conquered