Monday, September 19, 2011

Could It Be?

I have a 4 year old.  For the past year and a half I have been trying to get her potty trained.

We have made a big deal out of it when she would use the potty, given prizes, bribed, and even told her people would take her away from us because we were not taking care of her the way we should if she didn't potty like a big girl.  Anything and everything was tried.  Nothing phased her.  She enjoyed the prizes and praise and even told us she would just kicked the people can run away from them.  Nothing seemed to make her want to potty.

How could this be so hard?  Don't people say girls are easier than boys?  (Though come on I never believed that.  They can aim at things in the potty girls can't so wouldn't that alone make it more fun?)  Or that I went through this with her sister and so it was supposed to be so much easier with the second one?  Ava seems to be the exception. 

Why do I not have the kids that start going at 18 months and are done at 2?  (Although I think that is too soon.  I started both girls at 2.  They are just hard headed)

So off to Walmart we went to get more pull ups - the cheap kind because they are expensive and why should she be comfortable when a 4 year should be potty trained?  I tried to be understanding and follow the don't push (okay so keep pushing in our case) but it is embarrassing to be seen with diapers still in the cart when the youngest is 4. 

I called the pull ups diapers because thats what she used them as.  She didn't even try to go potty.  Yes, we were told take them off and put big girl panties on her because she wouldn't like the way they would feel wet.  Surprise...... she didn't care!  So to save me from constant clean up back to the diapers we go. 

Luckily the local school here is the only one in the area that accepts unpotty trained kids into Pre K.  (They dont help train them.  They will just change the diaper).  I have even started looking into Homeschooling for next year.

It has been hard.  I feel that I have tried everything, exhausted every avenue, and even the Doctor said there was nothing else I could do.  It's up to Ava now.  It's hard though because it all falls back on the mother.  That is who people criticize not the dad because this is somehow the moms job.  I was at the end of my rope and would start crying every time I had to change her again. Most times I had her change herself.

Finally at one of our MOPS meetings I added "Ava potty training"  to the prayer list.  The list is then prayed over by our Mentor and also in her Prayer Group during the week.  A week later and Ava started going to the actual bathroom!  I had even stopped mentioning it - I had basically given up. 

It took me going to Heavenly Father to get it to work.  Why had I waited?  I'm sure I prayed for it before but I guess it was a half -hearted one.  You know the type, you ask but at the same time are planning the next thing to work out the situation. This time I knew it would take God to make it work.  I was out of ideas and could not seem to get through to her.  He did!  I am extremely grateful and feel blessed to have a God that I can come to and depend on.

It has been one week without diapers.  She still needs to get the hang of wiping but I can handle the laundry.  I am just happy she is finally a big girl!

Saturday, September 10, 2011

The End Is Here

Last night I was on Facebook, feeling great.  I had had a great time with Justin (the husband), won a giveaway for a product I think is great (The I Like Book), and started my youngest daughters Pre K scrapbook.  Then I see a post by my former boss.  That feeling of cold dread set in as I read her words.
The liquidators set a date.  The last day Waldenbooks will be here is Wednesday the 14th. That is this week! She is having a "Good Bye" at the store for former employees and even customers.  Sadly, I do not drive and will miss it.
As you have hopefully gotten from my past several posts, this place has meant so much to me.  So yes, more tears are falling because this is the end.  I honestly thought I had gotten over the initial pain but last night I found myself crying again.  I have no idea how to explain what I am feeling.  In fact, you are probably still sitting, reading this and saying "It's just a store.  How can you be so upset over this? You're reaction is insane."  I guess I didn't capture the feeling when telling my tale of my time at Waldenbooks.  It has meant so much, I've met people who cared when I needed someone to care, I gained confidence working there, It felt like family.   There are still customers I wonder about since I no longer get to see them.
Former coworkers that I miss dearly.
I guess I never truly detached from the store since I always had planned on going back.
So don't be surprised if you see me out straightening books/ magazines at other stores.  It is part of who I was allowed to become.  A bookseller.  
My lanyard (minus the name tag) filled with pins I collected promoting books.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Conclusion of My Life and the Bookstore

In January of 2005 I started to notice a customer that was tall, cute, and very thin.  He was always in the Sci Fi / Fantasy section of the store which happened to be near the cash wrap.  I being the upstanding employee made sure to go to him and find what he may be looking for.  (Yes, I flirted with the guy. Flirting actually helped in selling books to men.)
It became a regular occurrence that he would be in the store.  Very well dressed also with dress shirt and pants and a tie.  What can I say?  I like men dressed up.  He started appearing more and more but seemingly only when I was working.  Then again that wasn't hard to do since I worked all the time.  In February I got my own apartment, I had never lived alone and was trying to figure out how to get my stuff moved.  It was also one of these days that there was a snowstorm and business was super slow.
In walks this guy (I didn't know his name yet).  As I was doing work up front he went to look at books and the girl working with me - a friend- apparently went back to him and told him "She's not dating anyone.  Just ask for her number already".  That was the day he asked and he called that night.   Of course I was trying to pack and he heard me.  Next thing I know he was offering to help me move since he had a truck.  So that was kind of our first date I suppose. 
So we continued to hang out until I finally asked if we were a couple.  He said yes (trust me it was hard to tell).  That July was the release of another Harry Potter book and another midnight event.  He got to be a temp worked at the store that night.  In between prep work and the opening my friends/ coworkers and I joked about me being pregnant.  A week later I found out the joke was on me.  I was and found out before my shift when I took the test in the bathroom there.
Two months later I found a ring in my locker when I was getting ready to leave work.  Justin didn't really say anything just waited in the doorway for me.  Though that I guess was my proposal.  We had already arranged to take the same week off for vacation time and that allowed us about a month to plan to get married.
The next to last week before I left on maternity leave I was working when I went into labor. Ironically I was putting up the Family Life endcap which was basically pregnancy books.  I joked that I was such an efficient worker that I even went to the hospital and had our first daughter before the end of my shift.  I went back to work after the 12 weeks were up though I had given up my AM position. 
About 4 or 5 months later I became pregnant again.  Feeling like I robbed my first daughter out of time to be the baby I had started to consider leaving work.  It was when I switched shifts with someone and that night my daughter said her first work that I knew it was time.  It became too real that I would have missed it if I had worked that night. 
Leaving was hard but I always felt I would go back after the kids were in school.  My youngest is now in Pre K and goes half day but next year she will be full time.  I was a year away from going back to a job I loved, to a place that holds so much meaning to me. In fact we were customers only but it was there that I went into labor with our second daughter also. 
So I get that most people are not that connected to the store.  That people only want to makes jokes about the closings, speculate, and get deals but it holds a lot of memories and meaning to me.  There are many other stories I could have added to this blog but since it already ran long I have kept them to myself. It really has been hard for me.  I tear up still and last night I learned that Waldenbook stores will close in 14 days.... now 13 days.  Hopefully I will make it back in time to take pictures to share with my girls the story of where our family began.